Focus

Well, I am finally moved. All of my belongings are now neatly packed into a 5x7 vault and the rest of my day to day necessities are now settled in a cozy upstairs guest room of my best friend's home.

Focus. This is the word that now echoes loudly within me and floats in BOLD letters in the forefront of my mind reminding daily of this pivotal moment, and around it spinning wildly the questions. How can I make this moment count? Can I finally turn my life around? Will I fail? What is the next step??? This moment seemingly simple to most feels to me like the test of my life. I have prayed, complained, cried, whined, and now been sobered by grace. I have been given the rare opportunity to be rent free and to pour that which was such a burden into a huge blessing. All of the success of this moment and how it affects my life moving forward is now entirely up to me. Although in truth it has been that way all along.

Over the past decade I have grown so independent that now to set aside my pride and personal space feels not only uncomfortable but foreign to me by nature. The fear of letting go of my pride and idea of self preservation was a fierce internal battle there for a while but I knew that in order to change my life I was in fact, going to have to change my life.

I want to make it clear that my goal here is not to be free of responsibly but to get rid of old debt, secure my base of living, and put myself in a position to be able to give and live. I want to be free of the consequences of poor choices that have affected my finances for so long. I believe there is a better way of living than how I'm living now and I refuse to be a slave to things that don't matter or have no eternal value.

Live like no one else, so later you can live like no one else.

So I will push through this moment of discomfort, through my fears of failing, and my selfish pride. I will make the most of this opportunity and I will keep pushing and keep my eye on the prize.

Step one of my plan is now complete.

Downsize to maximize!